It’s such a long list of things I want to teach my children. Things I want them to know. Practical things as well as ideas.
I want for my boys to know:
I want you to be an example. To be gentle and tender without being wimpy. To be a defender of women, children and those who cannot defend themselves. To love and prize a woman’s heart before anything else she has to offer. I want you to watch your Daddy. He is the kind of man you want to be. He loves me more than anything, except Jesus. Never stop believing you can fight dragons and monsters, those never go away, they just change form the older you get. I want you to find a woman who respects you, love her more than yourself. Be strong, not intimidating. Learn how to fight for truth and justice without mudslinging. Get an education. Save money no matter what. Always give your 10% to God, it was His to start with. Never be too cool to have an opinion on your wife’s clothes, decor, hair or ideas when asked. Help decorate for Christmas every year. Read often. Be careful about the situations you put yourself in. Be careful about what you let through your eyes. Guard your eyes, mind and heart. Be vigilant. Don’t allow society to tell you what is beautiful. Be willing to take your wife (or your mother) by the hand and slow dance with her in public. When you’re dating, keep your hands to yourself. Honor and protect your sister at all costs. Then once you get married, your wife too. Honor and love your future mother-in-law. Never give up the chance to laugh or make someone else laugh, but never at the expense of someone else. Always respect the elderly. Hold the door for them, give up your seat for them, and ask them lots of questions. They’ve had the chance to make a bunch of mistakes you could avoid simply by learning from them. Never outgrow the boy in you who wants to shoot nerf guns, build forts and play with legos. It’s okay to cry. You’re always welcome at our house and on your mom’s lap.
I want you to know how LOVED you are. You are beautiful. Always. You don’t need make-up or surgery or a push-up bra. Highschool will not always be fun, but know that when those other girls are being so cruel (as girls can be) that you have a Mama who will always hug you, wipe your tears, take you for a drive to get some ice cream and make you giggle and smile again. Don’t let anyone tell you what is beautiful. You are beautiful. End of story. Be a good friend. Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in gossip and ridicule. Your mom destroyed friendships in highschool doing this. Any boy who says you need to “prove your love” to him, does not love you. Respect your brothers. The best thing you can do for your husband is respect him. Don’t marry a man you don’t respect. Learn to fail with grace and laugh at yourself: you’ll find you’ve got more confidence even if you make the same amount of mistakes. If your dad says your outfit is not appropriate, trust him. Be educated. No matter what anyone tells you, there’s no shame in being a “stay at home mom.” Never outgrow the little girl in you who loves to put on high heels and twirl in big poufy skirts and drink tea and wear tiaras. Be generous. Help people and give to them without asking or expecting anything in return. Laugh often. Don’t be afraid of old people, they were once young like you. You can learn a lot from them. Hold you head up, but not so high that the only thing you can see is your own nose. Never be afraid to face the wind. Besides, it goes great things for your hair. Please come home often to chat and snuggle.